Coffee Talk with Christie

It was such a treat to meet you this evening. ;)

***

It's so interesting to think about how our path's cross with people who are genuinely VERY nice. I hate to use the word "nice" because it has come to have so many meanings... but I can't think of another word... what can I say? It's late.

Why is it that we give give give and often get very little in return... I wish that I could get a sense of fulfillment in just giving... why is it that I have become accustomed to EXPECTING SOMETHING in return?

During a few recent conversations, I have found that it may be somewhat "normal" to find yourself between feelings of selfishness and feelings of being taken advantage of.

It seems there is a constant tug-of-war going on inside.

In the end, I do not know if we can really be taken advantage of, if we are selfish. This thought is a little confusing, but those of you who are "there" understand.

I'm guilty. I struggle, at times, with these feelings, as do others I have spoken with in the recent past and I do not want to struggle with these feelings in the New Year.

In the New Year - my hope is that I dictate where my time is spent and that my time is not spent in a certain area because OTHERS feel like that's where my time should be spent.

I know that I am a creation of Christ - and I will answer to Him one day for how and where I spent my time. Time is one of our most valuable assets, if not THE MOST valuable asset we have. I want to be more in control in the New Year of my time. I have allowed others and other things to take my time this year. I'm guilty. In the New Year though, I hope and pray that this will be different for me.

Take time during this holiday season to relax a little... don't get caught up in the hustle and bustle of Christmas - enjoy Christmas - enjoy Christ.

Play Wii! Have fun! Let the cares of life take a vacation for a few days... TAKE CONTROL of your time, that's what I plan to do.

Yeah, I know, I haven't written in over a month. What's wrong with me? How am I ever to gain a significant group of followers if I am inconsistent with my writing schedule? This is the question that plagues me each day. I admit it. Somehow, somewhere, I have learned the dreaded art of procrastination and I want to unlearn it already!

Now that I'm done ranting about my inconsistencies... I do have something to say.

Recently as Dan was going to spend time with a friend, I said, "Tonight is a night that I would like to have a friend." He, of course, then felt bad about leaving for the evening. I was fine. Really, I was. I was looking forward to a quiet evening at home, alone. I really was. Why I said what I said, still does not seem to set well with me. Maybe that's why I feel I should take the time to write about it.

Dan said, "Christie, you really should have a friend." To which, I replied, "I don't need FRIENDS." I then came up with a silly idea of starting a "Rent-A-Friend" business where you could rent a person who would hang out with you for a night - with no obligation of ever seeing them again. One rule would apply: They would not be allowed to COMPLAIN while they were in your presence. Nope. They would not even be allowed to think about it! They would leave after a few hours of hanging out, and that's that. No follow-up, just a night out with a "friend" that you rented. No obligation to set up a "next meeting" - nothing like that - just a rented friend. You can rent pets now and designer handbags, in case you didn't know... WHY CAN'T YOU RENT A FRIEND?

"She is crazy at some deep emotional level", I'm pretty sure that's what I hear you whispering under your breath as you read on...

The feelings of being obligated to nurture a deep, meaningful relationship has become so incredibly unattractive to me recently.

I want to be like Christ. I hope (and pray) that you've been able to decipher that from my writings. What was Christ's example to me when it came to having friends? This is the question I must ask myself if I want to be like Him. (and I really do)

He had an "inner circle" of three in whom He invested and He had twelve (the three of which I mentioned before are included in this number) who followed Him closely. He was kind to tax collectors, prostitutes, widows, orphans and even the so-called religious of His time... even though He had issues with the way they did "religion" without RELATIONSHIP.

Okay, so as I type, this word RELATIONSHIP really pops out at me - RELATIONSHIP - FRIENDSHIP - DISCIPLESHIP - where are the lines drawn that separate these three? Do they need to be separated?

If I help lead someone to Christ does that automatically make them "my friend" or a fellow Christ follower? (A DISCIPLE)

Seriously, I know I am thinking about this "FRIEND" thing way too much right now... I have even noted recently that I do not have nor do I want many friends - but I want a HUGE funeral when I die. I'm not sure I can have both... thankfully I will be long gone and know nothing of whether I have 2 people at my funeral or 200.

I am beginning to feel like MAINTAINING FRIENDSHIPS are becoming harder and harder at this stage of my life.

I quite regularly enjoy "pulling away" from others to reevaluate WHY I live life and what my purpose is. Maybe that's what I am doing right now, maybe that is what has prompted this whole friends shmiends talk.

In the end, I know that Jesus is a friend that sticks very close to all of us, whether we feel like we have friends or need them. This is NOT a relationship that requires little work either... there is HUGE responsibility that comes with nurturing a meaningful relationship with Him. At the end of the day, THIS RELATIONSHIP/FRIENDSHIP/DISCIPLESHIP is the most important of all. If I can get this one right, I'll stop worrying about the rest.

Note: While searching for a picture to add to this article, I found that in JAPAN this type of business REALLY EXISTS! INSANE!

Matthew 7:16 - "You can identify them by their fruit, that is, the way they act..."

Fruit, to me (in the Bible), has always been a word I associate with the good health of a tree. I look at people as FRUIT. I need tangibles...

Today, I feel so free... here's why:

I remember sitting in a staff meeting recently saying, "I don't see my "fruit". I expressed this with tears flowing down my cheeks, and was obviously very hurt by this sad realization. I felt like I should see tons of people following Christ as a result of my efforts... to love, to serve and to connect with others in a positive way. This, in the end, is what I hoped would lead them to want to know more about Christ.

This scripture felt like a mini revelation to me this morning as I studied and here is what I have come to realize:

Even when I do not see "people" following Christ as a result of my efforts, I am free. I can't MAKE ANY ONE follow Christ.I can't MAKE ANY ONE GO TO CHURCH... All I can do is have good fruit. (aka - Act in a way that brings honor to God.)

This is something I feel like I CAN accomplish. Thanks God for reminding me today that life with You is not as complicated as I sometimes feel like it can be.

Today's post will be about my relationship with my Dad.

There is something about the relationship between a Father and a Daughter that is so very special.

As a child, I remember regularly turning off the television and saying to my Daddy, "Alright! It's time to TALK now!" My Dad would, of course, be watching the weather channel, needing to plan his next route, (as an auto carrier), and I would make all of his planning come to a screeching halt just because I needed to TALK.

Those of you who know me, know that I still need to TALK sometimes. =) (smile)

My Dad graciously allowed me to turn the television off and he humored me for a while with what I thought and still think was meaningful conversation.

That's what Daddy's do - they make time for their little girls.

I remember walking out to my Dad while he was working, and handing him a baseball, then putting my brother's baseball glove on my hand while telling my Dad it was time to play catch. For some reason, looking back now, I thought the whole world revolved around what I wanted to do. It's interesting...thinking about situations like these and KNOWING that my Dad made ME a big part of HIS world.

That's what Daddy's do - They take time for their little girls.

I feel so loved today, and I believe my confidence comes from the love of my Father - he always pushed me to be the best. I knew I could do anything, when my Dad believed in me.

My mind goes back to sleepless nights as a child. I would run into my Mom and Dad's bedroom crying, afraid of the monster under my bed (or something silly like that). I would always go to my Dad's side of the bed and wake him up to tell him that I was afraid. He would say, "What did Jesus tell us? He said, "Fear not for I am with you always." He assured me that I was okay because Jesus was watching over me and keeping me safe.

That's what Daddy's do - They help their little girls feel safe.

If you are reading today's post and wondering what makes a Good Dad - here are a few resources that may help.

I am a part of this wonderful organization called, Graduate. It pays.

Here's the scoop:

30% of 9th graders in the Winston-Salem / Forsyth County Schools will not graduate.

Around 900 high school students drop out every year.

• A dropout earns 32% less than a high school graduate
• A dropout is only qualified for 12% of available jobs
• A dropout is 3.5 times more likely to be in jail or prison as a high school graduate? That 80% of prisoners are high school dropouts
• A dropout is more likely to be in poor health, on public assistance and the single parent of a future dropout.

We must do better. Graduate. It pays. partners believe that increasing our high school graduation rate is the responsibility of the entire community and will take a sustained and coordinated investment of time and resources on the part of the school system, other public and private institutions, community organizations, and residents.

We invite you to join us.

Find out how we plan to stop the next 900 students from dropping out.

Let's make a difference, one student at a time.

Check out this link to sign up for volunteering! It only takes ONE HOUR A WEEK to make a difference, one student at a time.

I'm always working on something! =)

It seems I am always working on something. I suppose I am a bit too driven at times... I have only recently began to wonder if it is possible for an individual to be TOO DRIVEN.

Here is a quick bio for you:

I am driven to be the best.

I was taught the importance of setting and accomplishing goals at a very young age.

As a result of seeking accomplishment over the years, I now must DAILY seek BALANCE.

For me, truer words were never spoken, "There are not enough hours in a day".

When one carries a longing for accomplishment on the path we call life, the road, at times, becomes overwhelming and full of loneliness. Our commitment to work is far greater than our commitment to family. We struggle with balance. We all do. It's no big secret. We cannot do EVERYTHING. Let's confess. We are not perfect, no matter how bad we want to be.

I will not lie. I want and need to accomplish in my day to day - it gives me a sense of acceptance. I accept myself when I am accomplishing something.

So, let's see what I am up to today... I'm always working on something!

As I studied the book of Ruth this morning during my coffee time with God, I saw what I thought to be a number of comparisons between the life of Ruth and where The Church is right now.

This is what I learned from my study this morning:

There was a wealthy and influential man named Boaz who owned a huge field. He hired harvesters to tend to his field.

Ruth was a widowed woman who wanted to provide for her mother-in-law, Naomi. Ruth went to Boaz's field and after asking permission, began picking up what the harvesters left behind.

After a while, Boaz told Ruth to begin working beside his harvesters to gather as much grain as she could. He also told his workers to intentionally drop some heads of barley for Ruth to collect.

When Ruth took the basket of grain and barley to Naomi, Naomi told Ruth that Boaz was one of their closest relatives, one of their "Family Redeemers".

Our church has recently begun to set out to reach a harvest... a harvest of souls. (sounds so churchy doesn't it?!)

As we take the steps to do our part to help our Mother (aka The Church), our Family Redeemer (aka Christ) commands the dropping of a little barley here and a little wheat there until the field is harvested.

In chapter 3 verse 15 of Ruth - The Bible says that Boaz added SIX SCOOPS of barkey into Ruth's cloak to take back to Naomi. He didn't want her going back to her mother-in-law empty handed.

I believe that if we really want to receive the harvest - and we do our part to work in the fields, we will be able to bring a harvest with us. I don't want to go to church empty-handed anymore.

I feel like there is more to share about the "Family Redeemer", but I need to do a little more studying on that topic...

The topic of my blog today is "Openness".

Over the past several months I have tried to understand my feelings of being desperate for transparency.

You know that vulnerable feeling you get when you allow yourself to become completely open with others - leaving nothing behind the dark curtain of your soul? It's an awkward feeling. It's uncomfortable. It's scary, and yet, I LONG for it. I feel drawn toward it. Sounds a little strange.

Then I begin to ask myself, when others see who I really am will their perception of me change? Will I lose the respect of those closest to me? Will I be talked about as lacking spiritually in some way? These questions flood my mind as I press on toward becoming what God wants me to be... OPEN. TRANSPARENT.

It is NOT the opinion of people that should drive this decision for me, this I know.

Galatians 1:10 says, "For do I now persuade men, or God? or do I seek to please men? for if I yet pleased men, I should not be the servant of Christ."

The word, "pleased" in this text is described as: "accommodating one's self to the opinions desires and interests of others".

I was reminded yesterday at church that God really wants us to STOP WORRYING about what others think of us - it's not about the opinions of others, it's about God's opinion of us. At the end of the day, that's all that really matters.

So I'm walking down the road of life all by myself feeling like I am doing okay and all of a sudden I come to a road block.

Has that ever happened to you?

It happens to me with more frequency these days. I am thankful.

Tonight I learned that... (and I want this to be an official quote of mine by the way)

"Friends are like road blocks. They slow you down when you are too busy, they tell you of the harm that may lie ahead to protect you and they are always there when you least expect them to be."

In my lifetime I suppose I have had many acquaintances... but friends? Probably not many close friends.

I have had moments of weakness when I just wanted a shoulder to cry on besides Dan's shoulder - no offense to Dan. I just ALWAYS cry on Dan's SHOULDER. I need to give the poor guy a break every now and then don't I?

In these moments, they may be moments of weakness or moments of realness, coming to terms with who I think I am and who I really am.

My story needs to be shared.

When I am weak, I need to share.
When I am strong, I need to share.
When I am hurt, I need to share.
When I am clueless, I need to share.

The Bible says in Revelations 12:11 - And they overcame him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony. Verse 10 says, the "him" in verse 11 refers to "the accuser of our brethren, which accused us before our God day and night."

What is a testimony? It's pretty much a story, I think.

Why feel accused by the father of all lies? Why not just share your story with others who need to hear it? THAT is how we WILL OVERCOME. (not to take away from also having the blood of the Lamb applied to our lives)

Tonight I am thankful for the transparent people in my life. My friends who share their story.

They please God, I am convinced. Psalm 51:7...wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. What is whiter THAN snow? Could it be something that is transparent?

I recently saw a sign like the one you see in this post and thought... "traffic calming eh?" I would give anything to see a sign that says, "people calming ahead" or "thoughts calming ahead" in my day to day travel time.

I imagine if I saw a sign that read, "people calming ahead" I would want to live there. I would pull up to the place where I was to feel calm and just PARK THERE for a few hours a day.

I imagine that I would see thousands of others who also longed for an escape from the daily cares of life. (okay so don't start visualizing too much with me here... with thousands of people there's bound to be noise... and NOT a calming effect at all... my point is, that I'm sure thousands, perhaps millions also long for a place they can go to feel free from their worries and the daily stresses of life.)

The busier I become and the more I add to my plate, the more desperate I find myself for the quiet times in Christ.

After reviewing my trusty online scripture source - I found the word "calm" is located six times in the King James Version of the Bible. Two of these times, the article "a" is found before the word "calm" making it a noun.

These scriptures are:

Psalm 107:29 - He maketh the storm a calm, so that the waves thereof are still.

In this verse, the word calm is defined with the word, "whisper".

Jonah 1:11 and Jonah 1:12 mentions the word "calm" - in these verses "calm" is referring to being silent or being quiet.

I suppose the last definition is greatly in line with what I am craving right about now in my life... SILENCE. Quietness with Christ.

Based solely on these definitions: "being silent and being quiet" - it sounds to me like being calm is a CHOICE we must make in our day to day travel time - or daily walk with Christ.

I think once we take time to be silent, God whispers into our lives and we feel a calm that seems to wash away all of our worries.

Thanks God for showing me the importance of being quiet in your presence. I want to hear when You whisper.

Matthew 19:17 - And he said unto him, Why callest thou me good? [there is] none good but one, [that is], God: but if thou wilt enter into life, keep the commandments.

I have found the paradox that if I love until it hurts, then there is no hurt, but only more love. ~Mother Teresa

By Abraham Lincoln: "It has been my experience that folks who have no vices have very few virtues."

WOW! This really impacted my way of thinking today. Hope it can touch you in a special way too.

Today while sitting at Flow Honda getting a much needed oil change, I met a 21 year old film student from NCSA.

After exchanging words about how we could help each other, he with creating a film for Heavenview's new members, of Heavenview's baptisms, changed lives, etc., and I with his event planning and fund raising needs, I began to see this as an open door. (I feel so strongly that God IS OPENING DOORS for me in my daily life that I WILL WALK THROUGH.) =)

Tonight, I will attend a Salem Preganancy mentoring meeting from 6:30 until 7:30 PM. I believe this is also an open door for us to teach the love of Christ to those in need.

Today, I left a voice message for Principal Wynn re: the idea of organizing a monthly "Career Day" where professional members of our community would come to speak to the Griffith Academy students at Heavenview about career choice.

Here's to a great week in Christ. (Christie holds up her Sprite to present a toast...) (after having WAY TOO MUCH caffeine.)

All the best,

christie

Learning is defined as a change in behavior. You haven't learned a thing until you can take action and use it.

For I long to visit you so I can bring you some spiritual gift that will help you grow strong in the Lord.

As leaders in the church, we should DESIRE to IMPART something that will ESTABLISH others.

We are to impart VIRTUE to others.

I am enjoying iced coffee with Ginger Bread Syrup and cream this afternoon. =)

Sitting outside in the sun, blogging - man, this is the life! =)

I am working on a few things too though, I am not totally slacking.

We have just created a business card that each church member can use when connecting with a newcomer.

If you are interested in seeing what we have made up, you can go to Dan's Community Pastor Blog.

Have a lovely day!

I have recently studied scriptures that have helped me understand a little more about myself and the sin we all fight off on a daily basis.

Questions that I have asked myself and that I imagine others who have fallen into sin may also ask themselves:

"What is happening to me?"

Romans 7:23 (NLT) - But there is another law at work within me that is at war with my mind. This law wins the fight and makes me a slave to the sin that is still within me.

"Why is this happening to me?"

Romans 7:25b (NLT) - ...but because of my sinful nature I am a slave to sin.

"What can I do to be different?"

Romans 12:2 - Don't copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will know what God wants you to do, and you will know how good and pleasing and perfect his will really is.

After more time studying, I found the following verses that have really become a strong positive for me on my quest to learn more about being an overcomer.

Romans 1:18 (NLT) - But God shows his anger from heaven against all sinful, wicked people who push the truth away from themselves.

Romans 1:19 (NLT) - For the truth about God is known to them instinctively. God has put this knowledge in their hearts.

Romans 1:21 (NLT) - Yes, they knew God, but they wouldn't worship him as God or even give him thanks. And they began to think up foolish ideas of what God was like. The result was that their minds became dark and confused.

I ask myself, "Do I know God?"

I feel like I know a good bit about God. I was raised in the Church and was a Bible quizzer for years. (Bible Quizzers memorize the Bible and are quizzed on what they learn with other "Bible Quiz Teams" across North America.)

Then I ask myself, "How many times have I not worshiped God when I know I should have?"

..."Have I been thankful?"

It seems like Romans 1:21 is exactly what I needed to read.

I gathered two very important points from this scripture to catapult me into a new way of thinking.

If I worship God and remain thankful, I will not become confused and I will not find it difficult to make clear sin-free decisions.

In quietness and confidence is your strength.
Isaiah 30:15

Please visit www.shopandshare.org for all of your online purchases - while you shop, you will be sharing a percentage of what is spent with a worthy charitable organization.

100% of all proceeds will go to a non-profit organization.

About Shop and Share
The idea behind this blog and the sister site is to generate revenue for various charities. I have always been moved by the needs of charitable organizations to which I have been exposed over the course of my life.

I have always given as much as my personal finances have permitted and I have also worked very hard to raise funds for the various meaningful causes that have impacted me. I have to confess though, I feel as if my impact has been minimal at best.

For years I have tried to be innovative in creating and implementing fund raisers. I must say, it seems like I have tried them all. Some were more successful than others but never have I entered into the realm of “changing my world” through fund raising efforts. This is precisely what my aim is in creating and maintaining this site.

Shop and Share has the potential to do just that… Change the World! The non-profit, charitable organizations that will become our featured beneficiaries on this site are all noble causes that have touched my life and the lives of others in powerful ways. I hope to be exposed to new organizations and causes that will one day join the list of organizations that will benefit from the funds that this site generates.

How Does It Work?
ECommerce has grown at an unprecedented pace in the past 10 years. Estores, Social Networks and data processing generate trillions of dollars of revenue each year on the internet. Any good business owner understands the success of your business hinges on the quality of your advertising and the creativity of your marketing campaigns. Advertising on the internet generates billions of dollars for e-entrepreneurs who host high-traffic, quality websites that assist in promoting the products and services you and I purchase on the internet every day.

One of the latest new creative ways to market goods and services on the internet is by using affiliate marketing. Affiliate marketing consists of a retail outlet using private third party websites to promote specific products and/or services to potential customers. The content is provided by the retailer to a third party website publisher and integrated into their website’s content. When a potential customer comes to the third party’s website and follows the links in the affiliate marketing ad, it sends them to the retailer’s website with a cookie (a tid-bit of data telling the destination website where you came from and who you are) on their web browser. If the visit becomes a sale, the third party site owner receives a commission served through the affiliate marketing program.

The idea for Shop and Share is for you to use the Shop and Share Store to purchase products and services that you would normally purchase anyway with the good feeling that you are giving a percentage to charity by using the affiliate links we host on the Shop and Share site.

Remember, when you shop online, go to www.shopandshare.org first - to share with those in need.

I recently became a volunteer who oversees a mentoring program through the Winston-Salem Chamber of Commerce called Senior Academy. Click here to get involved!

Already, I see a difference in the lives of the students. Their desire to graduate has increased substantially.

Showing love never looked so good. =) Community leaders taking time to make a difference in the lives of ONE STUDENT, for ONE SCHOOL YEAR, by giving ONE HOUR a week - will be the difference between a student graduating or failing their Senior year.

I am so thankful to play a role in this life-changing effort.

On Saturday, June 13th, I will celebrate GRADUATION coupled with a BRIGHT NEW FUTURE with the students and the mentors who have taken time to dream of a better life.

I Kings 18:26 (NLT) says, "So they prepared one of the bulls and placed it on the altar. Then they called on the name of Baal from morning until noontime, shouting, "Oh Baal, answer us!" But there was no reply of any kind. Then they danced, hobbling around the altar they had made."

Hobbling is such a funny word to me... when I think of the prophets of Baal "hobbling" I think of old cranky self-called Christians. (just being honest) How pitiful!

Verse 30 speaks volumes to me - when it says that Elijah first "repaired the altar of the Lord that had been torn down" (he repaired in preparation for an unprecedented move of God)

When you become old and cranky in Christ, it's time to:

#1 - Rebuild the altar (others may have had an adverse affect on your altar, but it's time to rebuild)(verse 30)
#2 - Do what God tells you to do - no matter what others think (verse 36)
#3 - Have faith (verse 41) (Elijah heard an abundance of rain, before the rain came)

The result? God will give you "special strength". (verse 46 NLT)

How many times have we heard the stories of those who walked with God, then decided to go another route on their own? That's OLD NEWS!

Let's begin our week thinking about those who have remained strong in Christ - and make sure that YOU can be among those you reflect upon.

Rebuild your altar, do what God tells you to do, have faith and special strength to endure until the end is yours.

God has been so good to me. In this New Year, I want to share God's goodness with others.

I love the life God has given me. Each morning I thank Him for all the friends I have encountered and the loving family that will ALWAYS BE THERE for me when I need them.

What can I say? I LOVE THIS COMMERCIAL! (and I LOVE THE SONG!)

While visiting my grandmother recently, I feel like God reminded me that He wants us to be "forever young" in Him.

Let me explain: Ephesians 5:27 (NLT) - He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault.

My grandmother has Alzheimer's. While I sat with her a few weeks ago, she was rubbing my hand and trying to gently push down the wrinkles I have on my knuckles.

While she did this I noticed her age spots. She is absolutely beautiful. I began thinking of spots and wrinkles and Ephesians 5:27 came to mind.

Even though this is not theologically correct (this is NOT what the scripture is actually saying), it drove a point home to me.

Jesus is coming back for a church without spot or wrinkle. When I think of spots or wrinkles I think of the aging process.

I want to be young in Christ - forever young. I want to have the faith of a child, no matter how old I get. I want my relationship with Christ to be exciting and fresh, not boring and stale.

Fall in love with Christ again today - and be FOREVER YOUNG.